Did I mention that he was the King of Assholes? When Albert Einstein said ” Insanity is doing the same thing over & over again and expecting different results” was he talking about me? Did he know that as I speak to my ex my mantra is ” I cannot have a normal intelligent conversation with someone who is not normal or intelligent” ? Why do I continue to try and rationalize with my ex-husband? Do I really think that one day he will step up to the plate, grow a set of balls at least half the size of mine and do right by his children? Not unless Satan needs to borrow my mink!   I do always try and give everyone the opportunity to do the right thing before I blast them though.  I’m one of those people who is completely OCD about doing things right the first time so I have no regrets and never have to waste my precious time doing them over again. I was married to my exact polar opposite.  My ex is now married to his 4th wife and they now have his 4th child.  My son is his 3rd child and other than the new one the only one of his kids he keeps in touch with.  He now has 3 daughters and one son.  I honestly believe that the only reason he bothers with my son is because he is his only SON.  Obviously his ability to communicate with anyone on any level minus a badge & a gun leaves much to be desired.  To an outsider he is the nicest guy in the world, live with him and it’s a different story.  Typical alcoholic behavior.  Did I mention he’s a member of the NYPD? Surprised? I didn’t think so. After not bothering with my son for 2.5 years he finally decided to see him. This came about after my begging and pleading for him to e a part of our son’s life.  Hindsight being 20/20 I realized that his efforts to see my son were probably due to the fact that his new wife (  a fencejumping 25 year old ) probably wanted children.  Ding! Ding! Ding! I was right! Of course he had to prove to her that he is such a good father ( for no other purpose than entertainment ask his other 2 daughters about that).  Week after week would go by and no word from him at all.  Finally, I get a message last night that he wants to pick my son up Friday night ( his visitation states that but he usuaslly waits to get him on Saturday) .  I of course do not call him back since the last 2 times I tried to call him there was no option to “press 1 for english” and I could not understand the woman who answered his cell phone.  I thought I had accidentally pressed 2 for Spanish so just for giggles I tried it again. Nope! There were no options for english, so I never called him again.  He called me again tonight and said that he had to pick him up tomorrow because they were going camping. I told him Friday was our late night since we have karate and them we need to go visit my Dad in rehab ( physical rehab-not Lohan rehab) and we don’t get home until after 8.  Of course this answer prompted the whining. “Oh, I haven’t seen him in a long time, I wanted to take him camping like last year ( which means he will bring him home sick as he always does), everyone is so good to him” BLAH! BLAH! BLAH!  First of all, he wants to take him CAMPING? HELLO? McFly? My son is about as thrilled with the thought of camping as I am. We live in The Hamptons, my son is more than likely still suffering from the culture shock of last year’s  impromptu camping trip.  ”Everyone” is the Fencejumper, sister #3,  my convicted felon ex-brother in law, his psycho bitch wife and their spawn who my son is not a big fan of.  His family takes the fun out of dysfunctional.  I said it would be ok, ( while gritting my teeth ) as long as he was home on time on Sunday being that if I let him go he would be missing all the festivities that we already had planned for this weekend.  That was when he told me he wasn’t coming home until Monday afternoon. Gee, when was he going to spring that on me?  Sunday night at 8 when I would already be on my way to the SH Police Station to report my son missing after he wasn’t home at 6 like he was supposed to be? It’s really difficult for me to hold my tongue (ok, let’s make that a living miracle) .  It never ceases to amaze me that he just thinks that he can pop in and of my son’s life whenever he feels like it.  Thank God the child is pretty resilient to the nonsense that he has to deal with when he goes to his Dad’s. If anything it makes him appreciate me and the life we have a little more than he did before. Will I ultimately let him go? I’m not sure yet. We’ll see which side of the bed I wake up on tomorrow. Maybe yes, maybe no. I’ll keep you posted, I’m sure I’ll have an earful.

Until then I hope you all have a wonderful Memorial Day weekend, and if you get bored, come on out to The Hamptons! Never a dull moment here!